Rob’s Bladder: Hey moron, its spelt “caffeine”.
Rob: “I before E except after C”.
Rob’s Bladder: Yeah well there is a C in caffeine isn’t there?
Rob: Nobody likes a smartass.
Rob’s Bladder: Mate 2 cups of coffee, a glass of water and an orange juice for breakfast? I’m going to have to call in some reserve staff…
Rob: I’m ignoring you, I have a patient to go to.
Rob’s Bladder: um… excuse me? Hello? You should have gone before we left branch…
Rob: Quit your whining, we’ll be at hospital in 30 minutes and I’ll take care of you then.
Rob’s Bladder: 30 minutes! If your partner keeps driving over every bump in the road I promise you he won’t be happy about mopping out the back of the truck.
Rob: Hey it’s his job to clean the truck while I write my case notes. Besides if things get critical I can always use the bathroom at the patient’s house.
Rob’s Bladder: Oh yeah, that’s real professional, that is. “Hi, yeah look I’m sure little Jimmy’s broken arm hurts, but can I use your bathroom?”. That would go down really well with the family. Perhaps you could ask them for a magazine to read while you’re in there?
Rob: I’m done. I’m not talking to you any more.
Rob’s Bladder: Yeah that’s it, loosen your pants tough guy – it only gives me more room to work.
Rob: Look I’m busy here, And I’m sure I’ve told you not to talk to me while I’m working.
Rob’s Bladder: Things are getting awfully crowded down here. You know I can hit the override button at any stage?
Rob: you wouldn’t dare!
Rob’s Bladder: Is that a challenge?
Rob: Shhh, I’m talking to Jimmy’s mum, he’s got a peanut allergy you know.
Rob’s Bladder: Oh puleez! The poor poppet.
Rob: Will you be quiet!
Rob’s Bladder: “The squeaky wheel gets the oil”
Rob: I’ve got it under control. I’m going to keep focussed on my job and I’ll be fine.
Rob’s Bladder: You’ve checked Jimmy’s blood pressure 5 times in the last 10 minutes. Any second now his mum is going to ask you how long you’ve been doing this job… Here it comes… Hey there is a public toilet coming up on the left – go on, ask your partner to pull over.. I dare you.
Rob: I just might do that, if this traffic gets any heavier.
Rob’s Bladder: And how do you intend to get away with that? Little Jimmy’s mother already thinks you look edgy and nervous. Now you want to stop on the side of the road and run into a dodgy looking public toilet while her little baby is in so much pain – you selfish monster. Hey look, that guy is watering his lawn – with a hose…
Rob: …we’re almost at the hospital. I’m going to make it, then we’ll hear no more of your crap.
Rob’s Bladder: Crap? You really wanna go there? One word from me and the fellas who are looking after that Thai curry you ate last night could be working overtime..
Rob: (Groan) ……………
Rob’s Bladder: Oooh Look, we’re at hospital, but alas! There are 3 ambulances ahead of us, and that really slooow nurse is at the triage desk – oh boy this is going to be funny. “Can I have a mop and bucket to the Emergency department”. Heh heh…Wait ‘til I tell the lads in the kidneys about this…
3 comments:
lol!
Very good.
thats good stuff
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